Fig Business

Fig Business

 

July 4, 2018

Our Celeste fig tree is very productive this year.  We enjoy these figs either ripe, as fig bread, jam, frozen or whatever.  However, because they are so sweet, they are loaded with carbohydrates — which we are trying to minimize them in our diets.  Our consumption limit is about two per day.  Anyway, every morning we harvest the figs because we can’t stand to see these delicious fruits go to waste.  A Red-bellied woodpecker in a nearby oak tree squawks his displeasure at us for interfering with his fig banquet while we pick.  He and his buddies eat several figs per day, but we don’t mind sharing a few figs with them because we enjoy having them around for the entertainment value they provide to us.

Twelve pounds of figs

When our figs first began to ripen, we harvested less than a gallon a day, and I started giving them to neighbors.  They seemed glad to get them, but on later dates, when I asked if they wanted more, they tended to admit that they had not yet finished eating the first ones I brought.  So, “please, don’t give us anymore.”  One neighbor gave me the name of a church friend who was struggling financially.  So, I delivered a couple of pounds to her in town.  She was all smiles.

Girls started eating them immediately

Frances DeGelia loves figs

 

Every day the fig harvest increased until — after maybe the third day — we picked 10 pounds.  Since my neighbors were already overloaded, had their own fig tree or refused to answer their phone, we decided to offer figs for free on “Nextdoor” — our neighborhood web site.  Before the day was over, we had given away all 10 pounds and had requests for more tomorrow. OK, so giving stuff away elicits a feeling of moral superiority, but a little bit of that generosity stuff goes a long way.  So we decided to try selling our figs — as an entrepreneurial experiment.  Maybe it would be even easier to get rid of our surplus figs that way.

On July 3rd, Pat and I worked for almost an hour, harvesting 12 pounds of figs — which is the most we have ever harvested from our one tree in a day.  Then, I put an add on the “FaceTime Marketplace” — “Fresh Celeste figs, 2$ a pound” — and my iPhone started ringing and ringing.  Before the day was over, we had 34 requests for figs.  Apparently, the wild guess I set as the price was very fair — for the buyer.

“Do you deliver?”

“Where do you live?”

“Will you have some tomorrow?”

“Habla Español?”

“Will you call when you have more?”

One of our first customers was Mr. Anthony.  Nice fellow that paid one dollar more than the set price — a tip? or a test of my honesty?  I handed him back the extra dollar and he smiled.  The next day he came for two more pounds.

Allen Anthony -- a good customer

 

On July 4th, a fellow asked to save him 4 lbs.  “I’ll pick it up after work,” he said.  After dark that evening, he sent a message that he was essentially lost and could not find my address.  Later, he sent another message that his wife was with him, she was pregnant and became nervous driving in the country in the dark.  So, they never showed up and we were left with 4 lbs to sell the next day.  Figs do not store or ship very well so on the second day after picking they become too ripe unless refrigerated.

I asked Ms. Yasmeen if she would be willing to pose for a photo.  She looked very confused, so I asked Pat to pose with her.  That seemed to work.

Mrs. Yasmeen was a little camera shy

 

So, what have we learned from this adventure in the fig business?  Well, we have made $61 so far — enough for a steak dinner or something.  There is a reasonable demand for ripe figs in our area.  So maybe I should plant a fig orchard and go into a real fig business,  Right?  NO WAY!

It was OK trying it once just for fun, but the season is very short and labor is intensive.  I have considered chopping down my fig tree so I don’t have to do it again.  But I won’t.  So, next year we will face the same dilemma.  Maybe we will pick a very few and let the woodpeckers and raccoons have the rest of them. 

When we were waiting for our first customer, we realized that we had no change.  Pat finally remembered that we had a bag of quarters — that we use for toll roads — in the glove compartment of our car.   Our first customer required 16 of those quarters in change.  From then on, we were paid enough dollar bills so that we always had enough change. 

We received another lesson when one evening, I got a message from one of our female customers.  “I’m at your gate and it’s locked.  Remember that you promised you would set aside some figs for me.” 

I replied “I’m sold out today.  My apologies, I forgot about my promise.  But if you will come back tomorrow evening, I’ll give you two pounds for free.   

“OK, I understand,” she said. 

Pat kids me about taking photos of some of our customers.  I counter that it injects an element of human interest into a story and I always obtain their approval before I take their photo. 

Finally, we learned one lesson the hard way.  Pat helped pick some figs, but I likely picked about 95% of the crop, which might add up to almost 100 lbs of figs before the season is over.  A minor ailment first appeared on the index finger of my dominant picking hand.  It turned red and sore.  “Must have pricked it on a sharp branch,” I thought.  But then, neighboring fingers on both hands began to burn, turn raw and ooze.  “Must be in the way I’m handling the rough branches,” I thought.  Finally, when the fingerprint from my thumb no longer triggered the password device on my iPhone, I realized that the skin was being eaten by something, and I began to suspect some other cause.  So, I Googled “hazards of picking figs.”  Apparently, the cause of this ailment is due to the proteolytic enzymes produced by the figs — especially from the milky sap emanating mostly from the broken stem.  It was then that I realized that the skin peeling from the roof of my mouth was maybe also due to the same enzymes.  

So now we know that if we ever wish to turn to a life of crime, we can burn off our fingerprints with fig sap.

 

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